There’s always a moment whether it be reading, watching or discovering that you realise in that split second, that you are living and this is your only chance at life. It doesn’t happen often enough for me but when it does, I feel nothing but emptiness, sitting there with a tight knot in my stomach because I know I’ve failed myself. So many emotions whiz around my mind and body that I feel so unsettled and disconnected in the present moment. It’s strange to think how often I live in the past or future, and when I do suddenly live for the moment it’s almost too overwhelming, if not sickening. I’ve always known I don’t belong but there’s nothing worse than sensing the pain all over and knowing you just keep on failing and before you know it, it’s all over.