Aspergers & Me

 

  1. Although I have Aspergers syndrome, it is important that I am treated the way in which you would treat others.
  2. I may cancel plans on you last minute. It isn’t personal but it would be for me if I was forced to socialise when I don’t want to.
  3. If you see me wearing unflattering clothes with my hair not brushed please don’t assume that I am scruffy or lower class, I just put comfort before fashion due to sensory sensitivity.
  4. Avoiding contact or staring for too long. This is something many people with Autism have a tendency of doing. I know that many believe that people with Autism can not look people directly in the eye, which is true to some aspect (although I am able to hold eye contact with SOME people on certain occasions) but we can also stare for too long, not knowing when to look away.
  5. Just because I spend a lot of time doing nothing, does not mean that I am lazy. It simply means, I’m running low on spoons and need to recharge my batteries.
  6. Punctuality is EVERYTHING. Five minutes before the time we are due to meet, I will be ready and prepared. If you’re running late this will more than likely irritate me. I take it very personally considering I myself make sure that I am on time for everything and expect the same in return.
  7. I talk a lot. Especially if it’s about my interests. I genuinely find it hard to be quiet and I know many people who think Autism means quiet, unsociable, moody, strange etc. There is so much more to Autism than this and many would be surprised to know that we can actually talk for England!
  8. I take things very literally. I assume honesty in everything that I am being told so sarcasm doesn’t go down well with me.
  9. Superiority. Feeling like I’m from another planet. Thinking differently from the normality. Not fitting into society.
  10. My vocab can be very basic. I can struggle to get my point across. This does not mean I lack intelligence, I’m not sure why I’m this way but it’s definitely something I’ve noticed lately.
  11. I don’t like meeting new people unannounced. If you’re inviting me out, please tell me who will be there so I am prepared.
  12. I can’t handle loud noises, certain feelings and overly bright lights. Sensory issues are common with Autism which can affect us all in different ways. Some suffer worse than others.
  13. Socialising is very exhausting. I can take a day or more to recharge, meaning little or no communication with family, friends and the need to be in a quiet environment (preferably my bed).
  14. I am very fond of animals and communicate easily with them compared to humans. I will most definitely talk to a strangers dog and ignore them!
  15. Routine is key. I live by them and get anxious when it has to be altered for something I don’t really want to do.
  16. Mind blankness. I get these a lot when dealing with things like my routine being broken, time waiting around for events including people, mind exhaustion and feeling unsure of future plans for the day.
  17. Hate crowded places. I can handle these situations most of the time. I try to avoid going into town/supermarket on busy days. If I go to a concert I tend to stand at the back away from others shoulders. I am more able to deal with these situations when alcohol is involved!
  18. I fear loud noises like balloons popping, gunfire, planes, thunder, alarms and loud screeching voices and kids crying. It sends me into a state of distress and disturbs my sensory and concentration.
  19. I don’t like to label myself. I don’t like to fit into a category. I don’t like the thought of my personality being defined by my interests.
  20. Just because I mask does not mean I am ‘less’ autistic. It’s a coping mechanism that works in my favor most of the time, please do not judge.

 

Last but not least, Autism does not define me. It’s a part of me that I have become proud of. It can be very hard to be accepted when people don’t understand Autism and assume we are all the same. We are different but not just from you, from each and every Autistic person too. Yes, we share similarities but these all differ on severity. I may look normal but don’t assume that because I don’t look physically unable that I won’t struggle in life. I’m tired of being told ‘well, I’m sure everyone struggles with that too, you’re not the only one!’. This doesn’t make anything better, you’re only making things worse!

Just because I have Asperger’s Syndrome doesn’t mean I am unsociable or unkind. I still have my own characteristics and still manage to live an easy and adjustable lifestyle. I am still able to practice the piano, look after my plants and my foster dog, decorate my house, attend a wedding, blog and some creative activities, wear make up and make an effort (rarely), have a normal conversation and laugh with friends, love my boyfriend, have independence and control over my life.

I hope this post raises awareness and helps some of you understand a little more. I’m sure many of you can relate to this and some may not struggle the way I do but that is the beauty of Autism, we are all so different yet we all connect on a deeper level and are able to understand one another..

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6 thoughts on “Aspergers & Me

  1. A very good post Maria! I possess many of these traits as well. I only wish that I had the insight you have to them when I was your age all those years ago. It would have saved me from many emotional scars.

    1. Thanks Michael! My brains been fried this last week and wanted to keep up with some posting so thought of compiling a list of traits etc. I know what you mean, I’m 26 and have only recently realised a lot about myself which has saved some ongoing stress and depression along the way. It’s good you have the insight now though and can live a more understood life so to speak! Hope you’re well?

      1. Good to hear! I was thinking the exact same thing. My dad was diagnosed in his mid 50’s I think and he feels the same but like you said, it’s never too late 🙂

    1. Thank you 🙂 I know there’s so many other traits but didn’t want to write a very long list 🙂 As for the sarcasm, that’s probably the moment in conversation where the mask is revealed and I’m unable to mask anything. Glad you like the post!

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